Terminal Boredom by Izumi Suzuki

Author:Izumi Suzuki [Suzuki, Izumi]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Verso Books

SMOKE GETS IN YOUR EYES

I was just killing time. After I had cleaned my room, cooked, and finished the dishes, I had nothing left to do. So I was hanging around at this arcade, you know? I was there by myself.

I became aware of someone approaching me from behind. It wasn’t like a shadow fell over my game, but I’m sensitive to these things. It seemed like the person was standing and watching me. I looked over my shoulder, wanting to know who it was.

I saw an older woman, probably a little over sixty. She was filthy, her hair in disarray. She was wearing a jacket that looked like a potato sack. Did she work here?

‘Are you winning?’ The old woman smiled and immediately her face turned into a topographical map of a mountain range. What? What does she want?

‘I’ll give you these.’ The old lady brought out a handful of tokens from her pocket.

‘Oh! That’s so kind of you.’ As usual, I went along with it. I’m very good at going along with people. When I was a kid, Gran would call me a sycophant.

‘But, are you sure?’ I asked drawlingly.

She didn’t say anything and smiled slightly. A very deep dimple appeared next to her lips. It was disturbingly erotic. I got goosebumps. I couldn’t tell if it was a pleasant or unpleasant feeling. What was going on here? This old woman’s dimple was far more affecting than a young girl’s. Was I actually a pervert? I knew this nineteen-year-old guy who said he was only interested in women younger than six or older than sixty – a sentiment I couldn’t understand. Was this how he felt? Anyway, I thought I’d seen her before.

‘We’ve met before, right?’ I asked carelessly.

‘Sure.’

The old lady was no longer smiling. Was she from my neigh-bourhood? The people who lived on my floor were mainly all single guys, and she probably wasn’t a friend of the old landlady. No matter how much I thought about it, I couldn’t recall knowing any babies or old women. My mum was still in her forties, my gran is already dead and none of my other relatives is that age either.

I continued playing the game for a couple more minutes, trying to get these ideas out of my head and hoping she’d disappear. But the old lady didn’t make to leave, and I had to stop playing because I have a hard time ignoring people. I get too self-conscious.

Her face looked serious. If I wasn’t mistaken, her eyes had a determined look.

Uh, perhaps she’s taken a liking to me. That’s not good.

‘Um, what …?’ I began asking timidly.

‘You forget so easily,’ she said in a low, soft voice. And suddenly I remembered – Reiko! I dated her for a bit, when I was twenty and she was thirty-one. Whatever became of her? There was a while back then when I was really worried.

But this old woman couldn’t be Reiko. She looked a lot like her, though, so maybe she was her mother.

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